- If a Conservative doesn't like guns, he doesn’t buy one.
If a Liberal doesn't like guns, he wants all guns outlawed.
- If a Conservative is a vegetarian, he doesn’t eat meat.
If a Liberal is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone.
- If a Conservative sees a foreign threat, he thinks about how to defeat his enemy.
A Liberal wonders how to surrender gracefully and still look good.
- If a Conservative is homosexual, he quietly leads his life.
If a Liberal is homosexual, he demands legislated respect.
- If a black man or Hispanic is Conservative, they see themselves as independently successful.
Their Liberal counterparts see themselves as victims in need of government protection.
- If a Conservative is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation.
A Liberal wonders who is going to take care of him.
- If a Conservative doesn't like a talk show host, he switches channels.
Liberals demand that those they don't like be shut down.
- If a Conservative is a non-believer, he doesn't go to church.
A Liberal non-believer wants any mention of God and religion silenced. (Unless it's a violent foreign religion, of course!)
- If a Conservative decides he needs health care, he goes about shopping for and buying it, or may choose a job that provides it.
A Liberal demands that the rest of us pay for his insurance.
- If a Conservative slips and falls in a store, he gets up, laughs and is embarrassed.
If a Liberal slips and falls, he grabs his neck, moans like he's in labor and then sues.
That is a Fact.
